Best Lesbian Sex Therapist Services | Sexual Counseling

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Looking for a therapist?

If you identify as a woman who loves other women romantically or sexually, there might be a point in time when you will consider seeing a lesbian sex therapist.

Lesbian sex therapists can help you and your partner rekindle the spark in the bedroom, and improve your relationship more broadly.

In this article, we’ve looked at two online services to help you connect with a lesbian sex therapist.

Want to skip right to the suggestions for lesbian sex therapists? Here are our 2 recommended therapy solutions:

  1. BetterHelp
  2. ReGain

Best lesbian sex therapist services

Finding a good psychologist or licensed therapist can prove difficult. Finding one who understands LGBTIQ issues, and who can help with sexual problems, is even more challenging.

Below, we’ve looked at three platforms that can connect you with qualified, licensed lesbian sex therapists.

Overall, BetterHelp seems to be the winner of both of these platforms – they work with individuals. ReGain might be a better solution if you are looking for relationship or marital counseling specifically.

1. BetterHelp

Explore emotional well-being with BetterHelp – your partner in affordable online therapy. With 30,000+ licensed therapists and plans starting from only $65 per week, BetterHelp makes self-care accessible to all. Complete the questionnaire to match with the right therapist.

Note: We collaborate with top-tier mental health companies and receive advertising fees from purchases through the BetterHelp links.

BetterHelp is one of the largest and most popular online therapy providers that can also connect clients in the gay and lesbian community to licensed counselors specializing in LGBTQ+ issues, including relationship and sex-related challenges.

Finding a therapist via BetterHelp is easy. You simply set up your account using your email, and answer some basic questions about who you are and what you need. After, a counselor will be assigned to you, helping you get started with minimal hassle.

If you don’t feel comfortable with the counselor you’ve been assigned, you can change therapist with just a few clicks. BetterHelp can match you with someone who specializes in working with the LGBTQ+ community, ensuring that your counselor will be in a good position to understand your specific issues.

They also provide different ways to connect with your psychologist, which is quite useful. Apart from your regular phone calls or video sessions with your counselor, you can also reach them via text message. This ensures you can share any thoughts or feelings you have throughout the week, while they’re still fresh in your mind.

BetterHelp pricing is often cheaper than in-person therapy, making it a more budget-friendly way to speak about these issues, although it’s unlikely to be covered by your health insurance. Further, this service is adaptable to your schedule – you can book in at a time that works for you, including outside of business hours, so you don’t have to take time off work if you don’t want to.

2. ReGain

Tailored for individuals and couples navigating relationship or marital issues – ReGain is your online relationship therapy solution. Starting at $65/week, you can schedule one weekly live session and message your therapist anytime. Start your path to healthier connections with ReGain – fill out their online assessment form.

Note: We collaborate with top-tier mental health companies and receive advertising fees from purchases through the ReGain link.

ReGain is a great option if you and your lesbian partner are looking to get help together. If your sexual issues are related to your relationship/marriage more broadly, or you’d just prefer to get help with your partner, ReGain is a good choice.

This website has a focus on relationships and intimacy counseling. Not all of their counselors specialize in LGBT issues, but you can easily find a therapist with experience helping lesbian couples.

As with BetterHelp, you begin by making an account and answering some questions through an online form. If you want to, you may invite your partner to join the sessions. In the case of couples therapy, you will share one account, and can get in contact via video/phone calls and chat messages. You will both have access to text messages with your therapist.

ReGain is a great choice for couples therapy. However, if you have a long-distance relationship, this platform might not be the best option, as you can not add a third device to the video sessions.

A good thing about ReGain is prices for couple therapy are the same as those for individual therapy. In-person therapists sometimes charge a higher price if you bring your partner.

Why look for a specialist in lesbian sex therapy?

Lesbian couple kissing.

If your relationship is facing a sexual problem and you or your partner’s mental/sexual health is suffering as a result, it could be worth seeing a specialist.

To get help, you could seek out a regular sex therapist, however these professionals might not have the right knowledge or experience in how lesbian couples express themselves sexually.

Here are some of the reasons to look for a lesbian sex therapist specifically.

Lesbian sex therapists are better at analyzing LGBT issues

Rainbow LGBT flag made of paper.

Lesbian ladies can have problems in the bedroom for a number of different reasons. Factors such as social issues, cultural elements, and your psyche could be the underlying cause of your sexual issues.

It might also be that you internalize sociocultural standards, leading to difficulties with your sexual experience. We even see a gap in sexual research, which is often performed by men and focuses on heterosexual relationships.

A counselor focused on lesbian issues can help to provide clarity in this area. Some of the issues that lesbian couples face aren’t typically experienced in a heterosexual relationship.

Regular therapy is sometimes focused on heterosexual norms of sexuality

In previous years, loving a same-sex partner was often seen as taboo – before 1975 homosexuality was even classified as a mental illness.

These days, we understand that there is a wide sexual orientation continuum, and identifying as gay/lesbian is perfectly normal.

Still, heterosexual norms have an impact on how some people define their own life, even though they are lesbian. These norms can have an impact on how you express your gender identity and sexual orientation.

Some counselors still see heterosexuality as the norm, and may therefore misunderstand the issue you’re facing. They may analyze your situation from a heterosexual perspective.

If you can find a good therapist who focuses on gay/lesbian relationships specifically, they will understand how to help you and your partner.

How to choose the right lesbian sex therapist

Person receiving counseling from an LGBT friendly therapist.

This may seem obvious to some, but the first thing to know is to avoid conversion therapy. These practices are dangerous and unethical. If your therapist makes you feel like your sexual orientation is an illness, you should terminate the service and look for another provider.

It is important to choose a therapist that is open-minded and specializes in these issues. Search for someone experienced with LGBT-related sexual issues, and don’t be afraid to ask them about the specific issue you’re trying to solve. This will help you ensure you hire someone who knows how to help you.

Other things to look out for when selecting a therapist include board licensing by your state. This ensures that you can find a quality provider with the right experience and knowledge. Licensing is available for clinical social workers, psychologists, sexologists, marriage and family therapists, and professional counselors.

It’s also a good idea to select someone sex-positive and LGBT supportive. As mentioned before, if your therapist tries to convert you into being more heterosexual, it is time to look for a different counselor.

Problems that can be solved with lesbian sex therapy

Lesbian couple getting married.

Lesbian sex therapy can help to address a number of different issues.

A problem that lesbians sometimes face is what some researchers describe as “lesbian bed death”. This often means a complete cessation of sex in the relationship. Relationships with bed death can still be very intimate, but sexual desire and initiative is non-existent from one or both parties.

While regular sex therapists can surely empathize if you struggle with low sexual interest or drive, they might not be as knowledgeable about this issue in the context of a lesbian relationship.

Some women believe that less desire might be because of biological factors (asynchronous cycles or menopause), external stressors, having a symbiotic relationship or just being too similar and losing sex drive as a result.

Reduced initiative might be because these roles are less fixed in their relationships in comparison to heterosexual relationships. Some women also report that even though they do desire sex, they won’t show initiative as they are not sure their partner wants to do it and they don’t want to be rejected (or don’t want to pressure their partner into it).

Whatever the issue, your counselor can help you and your partner get the to bottom of it.

Other common issues that lesbian therapists can help with include:

  • The relationship between your sexual orientation and your gender conformity. A therapist can help you define the difference between these aspects, and you can explore this in a safe space.
  • A difference between sexual needs in a monogamous relationship.
  • Being lesbian while being a part of a minority culture or a certain religion where being LGBT is not tolerated.
  • Coming out, and the effect of this on your loved ones. After accepting your sexual orientation, it is usual to also share this with your family or friends and adjust. Finding a supportive network can be essential for your mental health.
  • Stigma and discrimination may lead lesbians to internalize shame or prejudice about their sexuality. This might impact your self-esteem, mood, and potentially cause psychological distress. Further, such shame might stop some people from exploring their intimate or sexual side fully.


In short, if you have issues related to your sexual drive, orientation, or identity, it’s a good idea to search for help. Online platforms can be a great help to process your past trauma and answer questions about how to resolve lesbian sex issues.

Still not sure how to get help? Feel free to leave a comment below, and we’ll get back to you as soon as we can.

Additional Resources

Prioritizing our mental well-being is paramount in today’s fast-paced world. The digital age has redefined therapy and psychiatric care, making support more accessible than ever. To guide you towards a healthier state of mind, we’ve partnered with pioneering names in mental health.
Note: We collaborate with top-tier mental health companies and we earn a commission if you purchase services through our ads.

Online Therapy

Discover a path to emotional well-being with BetterHelp – your partner in convenient and affordable online therapy. With a vast network of 30,000+ licensed therapists, they’re committed to helping you find the one to support your needs. Take advantage of their Free Online Assessment, and connect with a therapist who truly understands you. Begin your journey today.

Relationship Counceling

Whether you’re facing communication challenges, trust issues, or simply seeking to strengthen your connection, ReGain’s experienced therapists are here to guide you and your partner toward a healthier, happier connection from the comfort of your own space. Get started.

Therapist Directory

Discover the perfect therapist who aligns with your goals and preferences, allowing you to take charge of your mental health. Whether you’re searching for a specialist based on your unique needs, experience level, insurance coverage, budget, or location, our user-friendly platform has you covered. Search here.

About the author

Inez Van Roy, MSc
Inez is a registered psychologist in Belgium, holding both a BSc and an MSc in clinical psychology. Additionally, she possesses a certificate in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, a form of cognitive therapy that employs a mindfulness and value-based approach.

Her primary focus is on assisting individuals who find themselves feeling stuck or uncertain about their life goals. Inez aims to equip them with practical tools and information that can be integrated into their daily routines, empowering them to attain a greater level of autonomy and enhance their overall wellbeing.

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