If you suddenly find yourself single during this holiday season, don’t let it steal your joy. There are several ways you can remain merry even if you had planned the entire holiday around your schedule together.

Holidays can be a reflection of your relationship

Holidays are a prime time for breakups. “I think it’s because the holidays mark the passage of time,” says Dr. Bethany Marshall, a psychoanalyst who specializes in relationship issues. “People who are in a bad relationship question if they really want to spend another year with that person.” Also there are some individuals in a relationship who have no intention of committing. They will balk at the idea of investing any time, energy, money or love to the partnership. For these reasons some relationships won’t continue through the holidays.

Breakup tips

Each day plan a way to surround yourself with family and friends. That way you won’t have time to miss your partner while participating in your favorite holiday traditions. It will be important to focus on what you are thankful for and not what you believe to be missing. Try helping a family in need or giving to those that are less fortunate. It will give you a more rational perspective about your current situation.

Avoid any gatherings that your previous partner might attend. Determine which holiday party options that are most likely to expose you to new acquaintances and accept those invitations. Then schedule an appointment to pamper yourself with an afternoon at the spa before you go, to build your confidence.

There will be times you won’t feel like a celebration. Be kind to yourself and allow time to mourn the loss of your past relationship. It can take six months of healing for every five years you are with someone. After the appropriate time has passed realize you are wiser from the experience and are now ready to make better choices for the New Year.